Friday, December 08, 2006

Friday Funnies and Yay for Suse

First the Yay:

Suse posted this link which really got me thinking about how environmentally un-friendly I am. Time for a change, I believe.

Now for the Funnies (but who feels like reading funnies after reading that?):

From Impossible University:

Instructions:
Read each question carefully. Answer at least 5 questions. Time Limit - 1 hour. Begin immediately.

HISTORY
Describe the history of the papacy from its origins to the present day, concentrating especially, but not exclusively, on its social, political, economic, religious, and philosophical impact on Europe, Asia, America, and Africa. Be brief, concise, and specific.

MEDICINE
You have been provided with a razor blade, a piece of gauze, and a bottle of scotch. Remove your appendix. Do not suture until your work has been inspected. You have 15 minutes.

BIOLOGY
Create life. Estimate the differences in subsequent human culture if this form of life had developed 500 million years earlier, with special attention to its probable effect on the English parlimentary system. Prove your thesis.

PUBLIC SPEAKING
2,500 riot-crazed Aborigines are storming the classroom. Calm them. You may use any ancient language except Latin or Greek.

MUSIC
Write a piano concerto. Orchestrate and perform it with the flute and drum. You will find a piano under your seat.

PSYCHOLOGY
Based on your knowledge of their works, evaluate the emotional stability, degree of adjustment, and represented frustrations of each of the following: Alexander of Aphrodisias, Ramses II, Gregory of Nicea, and Hammurabi. Support your evaluations with quotations from each man's work, making appropriate references. It is not necessary to translate.

SOCIOLOGY
Estimate the sociological problems which might accompany the end of the world. Construct an experiment to test your theory.

MANAGEMENT SCIENCE:
Define management. Define science. How do they relate? Why? Create a generalised algorithm to optimise all managerial decisions. Assuming an 1130 CPU supporting 50 terminals, each terminal to activate your algorithm, design the communications interface and all necessary control programs.

ENGINEERING
The disassembled parts of a high-powered rifle have been placed in a box on your desk. You will also find an instruction manual printed in Swahili. In ten minutes, a hungry Bengal tiger will be admitted to the room. Take whatever action you feel appropriate. Be prepared to justify your decision.

ECONOMICS
Develop a realistic plan for refinancing the national debt. Trace the possible effects of your plan in the following areas: Cubism, the Donatist controversy, and the wave theory of light. Outline a method for preventing these effects. Critisize this method from all possible points of view. Point out the deficiencies in your point of view, as demonstrated in your answer to the last question.

POLITICAL SCIENCE
There is a red telephone under your chair. Start World War III. Report at length on its socio-political effects, if any.

EPISTEMOLOGY
Take a position for or against the truth. Prove the validity of your position.

PHYSICS
Explain the nature of matter. Include in your answer an evaluation of the impact of development of mathematics on science.

PHILOSOPHY
Sketch the development of human thought; estimate its significance. Compare with the development of any other kind of thought.

GENERAL KNOWLEDGE
Describe in detail. Be objective and specific.

EXTRA CREDIT
Define the universe. Give three examples.

1 comment:

Stefaneener said...

Sometimes that's how I feel like in general -- as though life is an endless graduate program and I'm not one of the stars, if you know what I mean.